Friday, July 31, 2009

Enough of this Shit

I've had it with all this "birther" nonsense. Just. Fucking. Stop. President Obama has already released his birth certificate, as provided by the state of Hawaii. But this wasn't good enough for you bunch of whiners. It's not the "long form" birth certificate. Wah. The state of Hawaii doesn't release the orginal BC. No matter who you are, if you request a BC from Hawaii, they give you a document which looks exactly like the one President Obama released to the public. NO exceptions.

Ooh, he's the president, you whine. If he wanted to, he could get the original, you say. Maybe he could, but why should he? The document he provided is perfectly acceptable, unless you're a complete whackjob. Another good reason he shouldn't exercise his presidential authority to force Hawaii to release the original is because as soon as he did so, Rush Limbaugh and other conservative douchenozzles would jump all over him for "overstepping" his presidential authority and overriding state laws. They'd use that as an excuse to stir their listeners into a frenzy by telling them President Obama is acting like a dictator without regard for the law.

Honestly, if Barack Obama wasn't a US citizen, don't you think the McCain campaign would have found this out? What about the Clinton campaign? Do you really think Hillary would have played nice and not disclosed this information? Both of these campaigns spent millions of dollars running against President Obama. Do you think maybe they might have looked into his background at all? Sweet everloving Vinnie, I am sick of this shit.

Look no one is saying you have to like the president or agree with his politics. I'm the last person who would discourage a dissenting opinion, not after the last 8 years we spent with Captain Funnypants running the show. Dissent away. But please, just stop with the nonsense. You may not like him, but that doesn't make him any less of an American.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Vinnie's Back

Hey bitches, what's up? I can't believe it's been over a month since I last posted here. Lotta shit went down while Vinnie the C was on vacation. The worst news was that Michael Jackson, the King of Pop, passed away at fifty. At least he got a few more years on Earth than the deal my brother got. Hoo boy.

And that crazy bitch in Alaska has decided to abdicate her governorship. Now she can concentrate on squeezing out more kids while hunting moose from a snowmobile. Maybe that priest missed some of the witches in her head. I know she thinks she's got the inside track to God, but I've never seen her at any of the meetings. If she runs for president on 2012, do you really want to vote for a quitter? If she couldn't handle the workload in Alaska, how is she going to run all fifty states?

I gotta go kids, Michael's gonna show the Christ brothers how to moonwalk. Good news, in heaven, he's black again!

Vinnie Says Chill the Fuck Out

Ay-Oh! Vinnie the Christ here, what's shaking blogosphere? Has it been a crazy fucking week or what? I've got a message from my brother for all of yous. Jesus says chill the fuck out, paisanos. All this fussing and fighting over gay rights, abortion, liberalism, conservatism . . .

Look, it's all just stupid bullshit, okay? Everybody needs to take a deep breath and just calm down. It's not worth shooting people over. The Beatles said it best when they said Let It Be. Course I'm more of an Elvis man myself. So settle down. Live and let live. Smoke a joint, get laid, read the Bible . . . it's all good.

Everybody got that? Good. Now quit fucking shit up down there or you'll have to deal with me. I've got your Messiah right here! Ay-Oh!