Enough of this Shit

I've had it with all this "birther" nonsense. Just. Fucking. Stop. President Obama has already released his birth certificate, as provided by the state of Hawaii. But this wasn't good enough for you bunch of whiners. It's not the "long form" birth certificate. Wah. The state of Hawaii doesn't release the orginal BC. No matter who you are, if you request a BC from Hawaii, they give you a document which looks exactly like the one President Obama released to the public. NO exceptions.

Ooh, he's the president, you whine. If he wanted to, he could get the original, you say. Maybe he could, but why should he? The document he provided is perfectly acceptable, unless you're a complete whackjob. Another good reason he shouldn't exercise his presidential authority to force Hawaii to release the original is because as soon as he did so, Rush Limbaugh and other conservative douchenozzles would jump all over him for "overstepping" his presidential authority and overriding state laws. They'd use that as an excuse to stir their listeners into a frenzy by telling them President Obama is acting like a dictator without regard for the law.

Honestly, if Barack Obama wasn't a US citizen, don't you think the McCain campaign would have found this out? What about the Clinton campaign? Do you really think Hillary would have played nice and not disclosed this information? Both of these campaigns spent millions of dollars running against President Obama. Do you think maybe they might have looked into his background at all? Sweet everloving Vinnie, I am sick of this shit.

Look no one is saying you have to like the president or agree with his politics. I'm the last person who would discourage a dissenting opinion, not after the last 8 years we spent with Captain Funnypants running the show. Dissent away. But please, just stop with the nonsense. You may not like him, but that doesn't make him any less of an American.

Vinnie's Back

Hey bitches, what's up? I can't believe it's been over a month since I last posted here. Lotta shit went down while Vinnie the C was on vacation. The worst news was that Michael Jackson, the King of Pop, passed away at fifty. At least he got a few more years on Earth than the deal my brother got. Hoo boy.

And that crazy bitch in Alaska has decided to abdicate her governorship. Now she can concentrate on squeezing out more kids while hunting moose from a snowmobile. Maybe that priest missed some of the witches in her head. I know she thinks she's got the inside track to God, but I've never seen her at any of the meetings. If she runs for president on 2012, do you really want to vote for a quitter? If she couldn't handle the workload in Alaska, how is she going to run all fifty states?

I gotta go kids, Michael's gonna show the Christ brothers how to moonwalk. Good news, in heaven, he's black again!

Vinnie Says Chill the Fuck Out

Ay-Oh! Vinnie the Christ here, what's shaking blogosphere? Has it been a crazy fucking week or what? I've got a message from my brother for all of yous. Jesus says chill the fuck out, paisanos. All this fussing and fighting over gay rights, abortion, liberalism, conservatism . . .

Look, it's all just stupid bullshit, okay? Everybody needs to take a deep breath and just calm down. It's not worth shooting people over. The Beatles said it best when they said Let It Be. Course I'm more of an Elvis man myself. So settle down. Live and let live. Smoke a joint, get laid, read the Bible . . . it's all good.

Everybody got that? Good. Now quit fucking shit up down there or you'll have to deal with me. I've got your Messiah right here! Ay-Oh!

We Don't Need Another Hero

Listen up Far Right Anti-Abortion Extremists: Scott Roeder ain't no hero. Gunning down an unarmed man in his church is the cowardly act of a terrorist, hardly an act of heroism. Dr. George Tiller's occupation may be anathema to you, but that does not give anyone the right to take his life. I am so tired of this schism in American politics. Abortion is legal and in some cases, medically necessary. Many of the late term abortions Dr. Tiller performed were necessary to ensure the survival of the woman in question, but I'm that doesn't matter to the so-called Pro-Lifers. Is the woman's life supposed to be forfeit in these cases? Are women little more then breathing baby incubators? Dr. Tiller was one of three providers in the country who performed these services for women in need. Now there's one less and the US Marshals have been called in to protect the others.

This crime is absolutely terrorism and I would lock Mr. Roeder up with others of his ilk. Anyone who participates in the intimidation of or commits violent acts against people performing a legal service should be considered a domestic terrorist and dealt with accordingly. I find it absolutely abhorrent that there are people celebrating this man's death and claiming it as a victory. A family man and respected doctor is dead simply because there are some individuals out there who refuse to respect the law and what it stands for.

Stupid is as Stupid Does

I thought this was a made up story at first, but apparently it's not. Some asshat named Mark Krikorian has evidently decided that it's reprehensible that Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor has a funny last name that's hard for him to pronounce. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. Prickorian-er, sorry, Krikorian should go take a flying fuck at a rolling donut. If you're too stupid to pronounce someone's name the way it should be pronounced, perhaps you need to rethink your present career path and do something a little simpler. I suggest crash test dummy. He won't have to pronounce any tough words or deal with any brown people.

See, the beautiful thing about America, Mark, is that we're home to all kinds of people who have brought their cultural heritage here and joined in the great melting pot that is this nation. If you can't get with the program, why don't you get the fuck out?

Travesty of Justice: Daniel Choi

This is one of the most retarded things I've ever heard of. Lt. Daniel Choi, West Point graduate and Arab linguist is being released from the Army due to his sexual orientation. This is completely fucked up. Every year, the Armed Forces lose thousands of men and women like Lt. Choi simply because we can't allow them to be who they really are. Here is a decorated soldier and an Arab linguist, something the military desperately needs more of, and he's not allowed to serve the country he loves. Who cares if he's gay? He's obviously a skilled soldier and patriot, as are many homosexual men and women. Numbers have shown that enlistment is dropping, so why would the military willfully turn away from an untapped source of soldiers? President Obama, Congress, I implore you to reverse this archaic law and allow these fine Americans to serve their country without having to be deceptive.

Knights Out did a phone in protest yesterday, but I imagine you can still call the White House and offer your support for Lt. Choi. The White House Switchboard number is: 202-456-1111

Gay Marriage Should Be Federally Mandated

I'll confess, I don't get why gay marriage is such a big deal and legal hot potato. To me, it's a pretty simple issue. We have a segment of the American people who are being denied legal rights to which they are entitled as American citizens. That is wrong and should be addressed. There needs to be a federal law legalizing gay marriage. Any state law denying gay marriage is unconstitutional and should be stricken from the books. I sympathize with the religious folks, but the fact of the matter is that this is a nation based on laws and rights, not based on religion. President Obama was right on when he said this is not a Christian Nation. America is a nation made up of many faiths. We have laws that protect that faith, but in turn protect us from being ruled by any one faith-see the First Amendment. There is no legal reason to deny homosexual men and women the right to join with their partner. Denying these people the same partner benefits heterosexual unions enjoy is unconstitutional and a violation of their rights as citizens of this country.

Bu-but the Bible Says It's Wrong. The Bible says a lot of things. In Leviticus, the Bible says not to eat shellfish or not to wear clothes woven from multiple kinds of cloth. There are also elaborate rituals described to purify oneself after coming in contact with a menstruating woman. As far as I know, none of these procedures are being followed today. Why do Christians feel the need to cherrypick this one law, that "man shall not lay down with man" out of this jumble of confusing and sometimes contradictory ordinances? If you're going to enforce the one, you have to abide by the others as well. Until I see modern day Christians wearing sackcloth and sacrificing bulls to purify themselves after touching a woman on the rag, then you can just keep your "Adam and Eve, Not Adam and Steve" signs to yourself, thank you very much. To do otherwise is hypocrisy.

The Slippery Slope Argument. This is my favorite and the most stupid of all the arguments against gay marriage/gay acceptance. The idea behind the slippery slope is that if we allow the gay lifestyle and marriage to be accepted, then we will have to allow pedophiles and other perverts to have rights and privileges as well. This is patently false and allow me to explain why: A gay marriage law needs to be worded as to allow two consenting adults permission to marry and be afforded all the rights inherent to that condition.

Wording the law in this way prevents the problems Christians seem convinced will follow from allowing their homosexual fellow Americans to have the same rights they themselves enjoy. People should not be allowed to marry children. I don't care how much you think you "love" a child. A child is not a consenting adult and thus it would be illegal to marry a child. People should not marry animals. You may love Barney the Wonder Sheep and Barney may love you (but I doubt it). Barney is not a consenting adult and therefore you can't marry him. Ditto for your toaster, your car, or any of the other bizarro things Christians seem to believe gay marriage will lead to. Say it with me again: consenting adults. It's amazing how many "problems" those two words can solve.

One thing this law would open the door for is bigamy. So long as the parties involved are all consenting adults, I could give a rat's ass. If you're stupid enough to marry more than one person, feel free to enjoy all the hassle that comes with it. Just as long as you're not living in a commune somewhere, breeding girl children to marry them off to sweaty Humbert Humberts at the age of 14, I have no problem with you.

And finally, let me suggest to you that I don't think anyone wants to have a gay pride parade down the aisle of your local church. If your church doesn't want to allow a gay marriage to take place on its premises, it shouldn't have to. That handy First Amendment protects you in that regard. I respect your right to disapprove of gay marriage, but I don't believe any church or religion should have the power to make laws that decide the fate of the citizens of this country, especially those not part of that religion. It's fine if you personally want to live your life by those laws, but the rest of the country shouldn't be forced to go along with you. That's why most of our ancestors left their countries of origin to begin with, to forge a republic free of state sanctioned religion.